Every Scooby-Doo episode has one thing in common — there’s always a fake ghost. Sometimes, that “ghost” is really just a guy in a mask trying to scare everyone with smoke machines and spooky sounds. In the SQL Server world, this ghost appears as the canned-query consultant. You’ve seen them. They roll in with a big name and an even bigger slide deck. They click “Run All,” hand you a 200-page report filled with screenshots and DMV outputs, and vanish into the night. They didn’t solve your mystery; they just dumped a list of clues in your lap. Or worse, you hired a big-name consulting firm, which brought on a…
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Welcome back, my fellow sleuths, to my mystery-inspired blog series! I’m having a ton of fun writing these, and I hope you’re enjoying the ride through SQL Server’s haunted hallways as much as I am. For this one, the “ghost” isn’t a person in a mask — it’s AI. AI has burst onto the SQL Server scene like a new member of Mystery Inc., promising to solve every problem, write all your code, and tune every query. But here’s the truth: sometimes AI is the villain in disguise. When AI Leads the Gang Astray Picture this: the gang bursts into the abandoned carnival, and AI points dramatically at Fred —…
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If there’s one thing every Scooby-Doo episode teaches us, it’s that solving mysteries is a team skill. The gang doesn’t stumble onto answers by luck (well… except when Scooby and Shaggy fall into secret passages). They solve the case because they know how to spot the clues and put them together. Performance tuning in SQL Server works the same way. If you don’t know where to look—or how to interpret the trail of breadcrumbs—you’ll spend more time running from shadows than unmasking the real villain. I see this practically every day. SQL Server Always Leaves Clues Just like Velma dropping and leaving her glasses behind, SQL Server leaves clues all…
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Every Scooby-Doo adventure has its running gags. Shaggy and Scooby bolt from every ghost in sight, Velma’s always losing her glasses, and Scrappy jumps in yelling, “Let me at ‘em!” But in this episode, Scrappy’s favorite joke is about a villain he calls Jason. Of course, Jason isn’t really a monster at all—it’s JSON, the data type we’ve been wrangling inside SQL Server and pretty much everywhere else across our technology stacks. . And in SQL Server 2025, the gang finally figures out how to unmask this villain and catch him faster than ever. Jason Unmasked: JSON in Native Binary Format Scrappy may play it up like Jason’s a big…
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No Scooby-Doo story is complete without footprints leading to a hidden passage. In SQL Server 2025, those footprints point us straight toward the next big feature: optimized locking. And like any good sleuth, we’re going to follow the trail step by step. But first, flip the levers that open the secret door: Turn on ADR before you hunt. Think of Accelerated Database Recovery (ADR) as the latch that unlocks the passage. You must enable ADR before you can enable optimized locking. (And if you ever need to turn ADR off, you’ll have to disable optimized locking first—no sneaking out the window!) RCSI = brighter flashlight. For the biggest win, enable…
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Every Scooby-Doo mystery starts with a haunted house, a strange villain, and a trail of clues. With SQL Server 2025 now reaching its first Release Candidate (RC0), it feels just like stepping into that creepy old mansion—except this time the mystery isn’t about ghosts, it’s about uncovering the powerful new features that go way beyond AI hype. And trust me, the clues are worth following. But before Mystery Inc. starts sleuthing, you’ve got to make sure the clue generators are turned on. Many of these new features are controlled through database scoped configurations. Think of it like Scrappy-Doo charging into the room—if you don’t let him loose, you’ll miss the…
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One thing I’ve always loved about the Scooby-Doo cartoon is that he never solved a mystery alone. Scooby and Shaggy could sniff out a clue between snacks, but it always took the rest of the Mystery Inc. gang to crack the mystery. Velma helped with her smarts, Fred with the traps, and Daphne with spotting the overlooked details—all of them used their skills to actually catch the villain. And sometimes, they even brought in special guests, such as Batman, the Harlem Globetrotters, or Don Knotts, to help tackle the really tricky cases. Performance tuning in SQL Server works the same way. The Tunnel Vision Trap When you’re buried in a…
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Like any good mystery, some SQL Server problems look spooky on the surface but have a very simple culprit hiding in the shadows. Every good Scooby-Doo episode starts with something spooky: flickering lights, creepy footsteps, and someone yelling, “There’s a ghost in here!” In the world of SQL Server, one of the most common “ghosts” I run into? Forgotten database compatibility modes. The Setup: A Creepy Little Detail Here’s the deal: when you create a new database, it gets the compatibility mode that matches the engine level at that time. Sounds fine, right? But let’s say you spun up an Azure SQL Database years ago—chances are it’s still running at compat…
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(Continuing my Scooby theme 😊, I am on a roll) Zoinks! I feel like I’ve been chasing this ghost for years, and Microsoft finally pulled off the mask. With SQL Server 2025, we finally have what so many of us have been asking for forever: a free Standard Developer Edition. Up until now, if you wanted a dev copy of SQL Server, your only choice was Developer Edition—which is basically Enterprise Edition dressed up for testing. Sounds great, right? Except here’s the problem: most production environments don’t run Enterprise. They run Standard Edition. And that mismatch has caused more mysteries than the Creeper sneaking around the amusement park. (yes, I…
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If there’s one thing I’ve learned in consulting, it’s that SQL Server, and other database performance tuning isn’t just about faster queries—it’s directly tied to your bottom line in the cloud. Databases, because of their large memory and IO footprint are some of the most expensive cloud resources. Every extra read, every bloated execution plan, every oversized tier you’re running? That’s money disappearing faster than Scooby Snacks at a midnight ghost chase. So, grab your Scooby-Doo hat, because it’s time to solve the mystery of runaway cloud costs. Clue 1: Start with Query Store – Your Map of Clues Every good mystery starts with clues, and in SQL Server (and…
